Matthew 16-20

Matthew 16:24-25 talks about giving up our lives for the sake of Christ.   That scares me and brings me right back to my fear of an unloving God.  While I understand that giving up my purpose and plan is ultimately best for me, I still tend to think I know what is best for me. (Grrr... stupid pride again)  I always freak out when I read this verse and think of the things that are most dear to me--my family.  Would God really hurt them or take them away from me?  What would be the purpose in that?  What would He be teaching me?  Can I learn that lesson without the pain of loss?  Maybe I am just crazy, but this is the train of thought that goes through my head EVERY SINGLE TIME I read these verses.